How to Make Decisions When You Don’t Feel Clear or Confident
When You’re faced with a Decision but Nothing Feels Certain, it can be difficult to navigate through. Making a decision can already feel like a daunting task. If you’re an overthinker or have other issues, this can feel almost impossible. You may ask yourself, “What if I make the wrong decision?” or “What if this decision makes my life worse? ” These are a few of the questions that can plague you when you’re placed in a position to make a major decision. A major decision that can impact your life and possibly the lives of others around you. No pressure.
When a Decision Feels Too Big to Get Wrong
I knew change had to happen in my own life. I struggled with the indecisiveness of making a drastic change and the possibility of failing. What if I didn’t make the change? Would I be happy remaining stagnant? I knew the environment I was in was not nurturing my growth or the person I was becoming.
As a single mother of 2, I feared failing my children. How would I explain making a bad decision that cost us everything we have, including our apartment? I also knew this was the voice of doubt. In the beginning, that voice was strong, but my faith in God became stronger.
Once you begin to ignore the voice of doubt, it loses its power over you. I learned through my faith that God is not a God of confusion. The voice of doubt is not how God operates. Soon I realized the voice of doubt was becoming quieter and quieter, until one day it was gone from this specific situation.
I continued growing my faith and this helped me see things in a different perspective than what I was so used to being stuck in.
When Every Option Feels Uncertain
There will come a time when all options feel uncertain. The voice of doubt will be louder than the rest, especially when you’re making a decision from a stressed mindset. The thought of making the wrong decision increases anxiety, especially the ‘what if’s’. Mentally, the spiraling thought process can go on and on leading to exhaustion. It can be so debilitating that it can keep you from making any decision at all. Stagnation.
Stagnation is the enemy of progress. The enemy of growth, and we were all created for growth. Growth is not linear, but it requires lots of decision making. Many times the decisions are not comfortable ones, and this is normal. The discomfort that comes with making a decision can create uncertainty in our ability to make decisions overall. We begin to question whether we can be adults without supervision in the most dramatic cases.
What You’re Really Looking for When Making a Decision
You want the decision to feel good. Before making a decision, everything will feel scary. Doubt will try to make you think things like “you’re making a mistake” or other similar nerve-inducing thoughts. It knows just what to say to get your nervous system panicking too.
Its the voice of fear. The fear of the unknown, and not knowing what to expect. It’s also the fear of leaving the ‘comfort zone’. The bigger the fear, the more confirmation you have to make that decision. Think of it this way: if the decision wouldn’t lead to anything great, why would you have so much fear? A reaction moving you away from making that same decision.
Fear is a tactic of the enemy to keep you stagnant. To keep you from unlocking your highest potential. Fear when making a decision is a good thing. It’s also worth exploring personally. Ask yourself, "What am I really afraid of?”. Success? Failure?
It’s not a failure. We have all failed at one time or another in our lives. Guess what? We are still standing, If anything, we came out stronger than ever because of the experience. What you’re looking for in a decision is how uncomfortable it makes you. That feeling, it’s gold!
Making a Decision Without Overcomplicating It
It can be very easy to overcomplicate making a decision. If you’re an overthinker, it goes without saying that decision making is not an easy task. If you’re like me, we can’t make a decision without making a list, checking it twice or pros and cons before deciding anything. Not every decision requires all that back and forth. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith and hope for the best. This is also where God plays an important role. God has plans for you, the way he has plans for me.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.”- Jeremiah 29:11
This is where faith comes in. To truly believe what is already written, you learn to make decisions without overcomplicating it. You move by faith not by sight, because that is how we are meant to live. Easier said than done, am I right?
The Role of Faith When You Don’t Have Full Confidence
Walking by faith not by sight sounds foreign to many. To others it can be straight up foolish. If you read scripture, many of the ones chosen for a big job did not have the confidence to do the jobs that were assigned to them. For one, Moses did not want to go against pharaoh and be the spokesperson for the Israelites freedom. Noah could have wrestled with whether or not he should build a boat now vs next week when the conditions are ‘right’. These are just a few examples of the importance the role of faith plays when you don’t have full confidence. It’s trusting something higher than you. It’s knowing that everything will work out how it’s supposed to.
Faith is what you have when you have no control over your circumstances or situation. It’s believing in a higher power that you cannot see, touch, or smell in the traditional sense. You CAN see God’s hands in your circumstances when you slow down and reflect.
Staying Grounded After You’ve Made a Decision
Even after you’ve made the decision, it’s normal to doubt whether you’ve made the right decision or not. The pressure of having immediate results can become overwhelming. It’s important to have a sort of pep talk with yourself. To acknowledge the anxiety and the stress of the unknown. Of knowing that you’ve made a decision you wouldn’t normally have made and that creates discomfort. To know that this is normal and it too shall pass.
“Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning”- Psalm 30:5
This is a reminder that you may stress or even cry about something in the moment, in this case a decision. However, joy comes in the morning. The feeling of stress and discomfort does not last. It’s temporary. Remaining grounded after making a decision looks like not responding to the feelings of doubt or the ‘what if’ thoughts.
Closing: You Don’t Need Certainty to Choose Your Next Step
You don’t need to have everything figured out before you take your next step. You just need to take that first leap (step). Once you prove to yourself that you can indeed take a step regardless of the outcome, you will have completed the hardest step. It takes tremendous courage to take a step outside of your comfort zone with faith. Whether you have a developed relationship with God, an act like this is done with faith. Faith that everything will work out for the best and your higher good. Even if it doesn't work out, you will have learned a valuable lesson: You will never know until you try.
If you’re navigating a decision and need a more structured way to work through it, I created a guided workbook to help you move forward with clarity and intention.
You can access it by visiting my Resources page and entering your email here:
👉 https://www.wholemindspirit.com/resources
